yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
