please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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