You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.