summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Randomize
