I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?