So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Randomize
