Sry I called you an 8
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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