There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
