And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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