Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
