4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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