i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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