I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.