i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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