i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
