I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
