It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
