I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize