Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
third nipple confirmed
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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