the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
