someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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