I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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