Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
