whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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