i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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