you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
