i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
