What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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