Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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