i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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