I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
