I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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