You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize