Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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