Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize