walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
two words: eviction party
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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