we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
