piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
