I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
