epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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