i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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