I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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