The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize