I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
