All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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