He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
