apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
