I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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