I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
