Christians are straight up FREAKS
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
