She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
