everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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